this is where i let out what i keep to myself and blog/reblog whatever i please. for me, and me only. enjoy.
First of all, this post is not towards anyone. I am not mad or bitter; I just would like to point out something that I realized about myself today.
So, today was probably the last time I’ll play in an actual soccer season ever again. None of my friends have ever really watched me play (besides the friends that play with me).A few of them told me that they could make it today, but things came up and they never showed up. I remember this happening to me during my senior year in high school and my ex bf told me he would come to my game, but he ended up doing something else. I remember looking up in the stands just hoping that he would show up out of nowhere… Today, that’s what i did. I looked out in the audience waiting for anyone, at least one of my friends, to come and support. For the first 15 minutes , I wasn’t even concentrating on the game. I was just wondering if they were going to come, somehow.. I even accidentally deflected the ball off my foot and into my own goal. Second time in my life i’ve ever done that.. embarrassing, but whatever. Anyway… after I pretty much gave up hope, my eyes became watery. I mean, I understand that my friends lives don’t revolve around mine, but I thought..it would be so awesome if they could actually watch me play. Soccer is important to me. It makes me, me. It’s what separates me from the rest of my friends. Most of my friends have something that makes them, them. They’re either funny, super nice, can dance, or are just so much fun having around. I could never figure out what it was that made me the least bit interesting.. But today, I discovered that, in a way, it was soccer. I wouldn’t say that I’m an amazing soccer player, but it would’ve been nice if my friends could see me at my prime; doing something that I love, something that makes me happy, something that’s just… me.
hi. here’s some random facts for anybody who might care.
- I’ve had my tumblr since September 2009
- I love watermelon and noodles
- I won’t cry in most real life heart breaking situations, but i’ll cry watching toy story 3
- I think the Franco brothers are pretty much perfect
- I believe love never ends
- I can’t explain myself very well
- I think the main reason i like math is because i’m good at it and it’s easy
- I play the piano but i can’t read notes
- I love God and I live for him. i accept everyone whether they do or not
- I love to sing, i just wish i was good at it
- My family and friends are of much value to me
- I have many sides to me that i could not begin to define
- I love every boy that i’ve ever said ‘i love you’ too
- I do not hate anyone
- What makes me happy is other people being happy
- I can forget about all my problems once i’m out with my friends
- I currently don’t know what i want to do for the rest of my life
- I’m 5’7 and lots of people ask if i played basketball or volleyball, when i actually played soccer all my life
- Even though i’m not entirely happy with the life i have, i am extremely grateful
- I think vanilla > chocolate
- I have a weird sense of humor and i’m sarcastic most of the time
- I think it’s dumb that people are fake
- I ‘suffer in silence’
- I like when people notice the nice things that i do
- I have the weirdest relationship with my brothers
- I’m hungry
- I love guys with blue eyes. or green
- I worry for the generations to come
that is all. for now.
happy tumblin’ everyone
